Everyone's back from Haiti! Yay! I can't wait to hear all the stories and see all the pictures! I know God worked in amazing ways in Haiti. Praise Him for his unceasing work in the lives of people around the world!
While my family was in Haiti last week watching God work, He was speaking to my heart here in Nebraska, too. God reminded me of something.
I am a worrier.
Those of you who know me are saying, "duh!" right about now.
But I surprised myself. You see, we're doing Beth Moore's study of Esther for women's Biblestudy at church right now. On one week's video, Beth spent a lot of time speaking about this very thing. She challenged us to fill out this blank, "If the worst thing I can imagine happens, then ....."
Then I'll lay on the floor in a heap and want to die.
I'll never move again.
Well, eventually, I will move because God is faithful.
I was totally tracking with her. I thought, "I will trust God in anything because I stand on the unshakable foundation of his faithfulness."
Nice sentiment, huh?
Then four little words shook my unshakable foundation.
"Trouble with his asthma."
"What does that mean?" I panicked. He probably can't breathe - like at all. When he says he's having trouble with his asthma, it means he needs to go to the hospital and is trying to put it off for as long as possible. There's probably no hospital in Haiti. And if there is, they probably don't have the right medicine. They'll probably have to fly him to Miami. And he'll probably die of an asthma attack before he gets there. (Have I ever told you I have a big imagination?)
I'm very good at panicking.
So I freaked my sister out, and she called the "for emergencies only" cell phone to talk to her husband and find out what was really going on. Turns out my dad was not feeling great. But it had nothing to do with his asthma.
Stop panicking Melody!!!
And I felt silly.
All my confident sounding thoughts and words evaporated in that one unexpected moment.
Isn't that how life goes?
You think you have everything under control. Like you're walking with God, and He's helping you deal with your life by His Spirit. And then the unexpected happens and you completely lose it. Your sin nature pops up again when you least expect it.
I learned something valuable.
Next time, I'm going to have to go to Haiti too. No worries if I'm there and can see exactly what's going on, right?
Or, I could learn to give my worrying heart to God and let Him teach me to trust Him. With everything. All the time. Even when my eyes can't see.
"You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD God is an everlasting rock."