Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Amazing grace

Do you ever have days where you feel like you're losing your mind?
Where everything seems to go wrong?
Where you want to quit whatever it is you do, take your favorite book and hide in a story until you forget how chaotic your life is?
I had one of those days.
Spilled juice.
Frozen bread.
NO stroller in the back of the van.
Forgot the sunscreen. (Yay for friends who remember thiers!)
Parking ticket. (Who knew it's illegal to park on the left side of the road?)
Forgot to put the sunscreen on me.
Sleepy kids.
Sleepy mommy.
Broken glass.
Spilled water.
Kylie tries to feed a bottle to a sleeping Ava.
A screaming baby who wakes up a still sleepy Julia.
Mommy loses her temper.
Serious screaming.
Destroyed house.
Daddy out flying til 11:00 at night.
Movie, anyone?
Can it be bedtime now?
Tomorrow will be better, right?

Sometimes I feel like the worst mother ever. I was in Sams on Friday. I took all four kids grocery shopping. I know, not the best idea. But a person has to have food, and Caleb's busy. So there I was in the frozen food aisle trying to grab a bag of frozen strawberries. I was applauding myself on my good mothering skills. "The kids are going to love the smoothies I make with these! Healthy and yummy!"
Pride goes before a fall.
I turn around to see this older woman glance at me contemptuously, annoyance written clearly on her face. I wonder why. Can't she see the healthy food I'm buying for my kids. Hmmm.... my kids. I suppose that's them spinning my giant-sized cart loaded with groceries and babies around and around like a top in the middle of the aisle.
Mommy lost it again.
My brain frantically searched for the most terrible threat I could think of that was safe enough to not get me reported to Child Protective Services if overheard.
I cling to.....what do I cling to? What do I have to cover these gaping holes in my mommy skills?
I hear a faint whisper:
"My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:9)
"And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed." (2 Cor. 9:8)
My lifeline.
My only hope.

2 comments:

Chip Burkitt said...

You got it exactly right. God's grace is for everyday use, not just to get our ticket to heaven. It's like having a credit card that Jesus pays the bills on.

Marissa said...

Oh, I can SO relate!!! I wish we were closer to sit and have coffee and laugh about our crazy days with kids, and talk about the goodness of our God, whose grace is enough :) Oh thank you Jesus!!